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Tap into the UK: No sooner had This is Spinal Tap opened in the UK in late 2000 when controversy erupted. A poster placed in Tube stations in London advertised the film with the line "Bigger Than Jesus ... and Funny as Hell!", a reference to John Lennon's infamous quote about the popularity of the Beatles. The Advertising Standards Authority received numerous complaints from people who said they were offended by the suggestion that Spinal Tap is bigger than Jesus Christ. The agency concluded, however, that the poster does no harm to the Christian faith. It made no ruling on the effect of Tap's music on Christian ears. The posters are being stolen from Tube stations at an alarming rate.


If someone flubs a line from This is Spinal Tap, he or she should receive Tap demerits. If you were to say, "No, we're all out of that. Do you wear brown?" as opposed to "Do you wear black?" you would receive one demerit. Or if you were to say, "This is my new special friend Barbi" instead of Cindy, you would receive two demerits (you figure it out). Accumulate 10 demerits and it's back to the Spinal Tap Remedial School for the Spinally Impaired, where they teach things like proper English voice inflections, Spinal Tap memory triggers (where one line leads to the memory of another) and Arnie Fufkin fashion tips.

TIM ZUELLIG
Chicago


If you read the April 1992 issue of Guitar World, you probably entered the contest to win Nigel Tufnel's Marshall stack guitar. Three of those guitars exist — one is Nigel's, one is at the factory, and one went to the winner. I have a friend who used to work at Guitar World, and he told me about how everyone would huddle around a speakerphone and tell the person they'd won. When they picked the Tap winner, the guy was happy enough. Then he started calling on a regular basis asking where the prize was. Now, remember, this was a custom guitar, one of three in the world — it simply wasn't completed by the deadline for entries. But he kept calling. Finally, he had his lawyer call and threaten legal action. The factory eventually delivered the guitar, and sure enough, the next week, someone spotted a classified ad to the tune of "ONE-OF-A-KIND NIGEL TUFNEL GUITAR..." The ungrateful non-Taphead bastard wanted it so he could sell it. After being one of the hopeful Nigel wannabes who dreamt of winning, this made me angry. Somewhere out there in the collector's market lives Nigel's Marshall guitar, and I'm sure it can be yours...for a price.

A DISGUSTED TAPHEAD



I was just at the Hard Rock Cafe in Boston last night and they have Nigel's Marshall Stack Jackson guitar. I was tempted to make a run for the door with it, but I figured, what's the point?

MATT ST. HUBBINS
Worchester, Massachussetts



Like any good literature, your Spinal Tap site made me laugh, but it also made me think. As a true Taphead, I noted that you made some glaring omissions from your Tap discography. You may disbelieve, but I own all of them or at least have held them in my hot little hands. As further research affords me more insight into the ephemera of truly obtuse Spinal Tap releases, I promise to keep you informed.

SCOTT SOOKMAN
Vinyl Hell
1870 N. Vermont Ave., #506
Los Angeles, California 90027



I noticed the Spinal Tap sound clip on your Tap fan site for Bach Toccata and Fugue in D Minor. Could you tell me how this fits into the video, who plays it, and is it on the soundtrack album?

JANELL R. DUXBURY
Rockin' the Classics



Is it true Tap recorded its album Smell the Glove in Dublin? I want to find the studio and write my name on the wall outside.

PETER FITZPATRICK
Dublin, Ireland



When I went to the Tap show at the Universal Studios Amphitheatre in Los Angeles, some members of Meconium were hanging outside. I had an extra ticket. As these guys approached, I asked if they needed a ticket, and one said, "I don't need tickets, my dad is in the band." When I saw The Return of Spinal Tap, it all made sense. Marty DiBergi was at the show and when he walked down the aisle to his seat, the audience cheered. There was a drawing held to win an older version of Jim the Skull. Darn — I didn't win!

BRENDA BRUBACKER
Los Angeles



People at work clued me into your Tap Web page and I may reward them. In the meantime, I'll steam my vegetables in my Spinal Tap calendar (colander) that a friend rescued from the trash can of his boss. Why are promotional items wasted on the unappreciative? Did you know that Derek Smalls is mentioned in several adverts that appear on the back of Jethro Tull's Thick as a Brick? What is Derek's relationship to the band?

RAY COFFEY



I have been thinking of putting together a Tap database called HyperTap.

SVEIN HALVORSEN
Norway



There are only two bands that I consider to be in the same league as Tap: the Beatles and KISS. Unfortunately, my Tap collection is limited. When I tried to apply to the fan club, my letter was returned with green smudges. When I attempted to see Tap during their reunion tour, my car was hit by a boat on the highway, quite an irregular situation, that.

HUGH ASNEN
Philadelphia


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